Hooray! another Christmastime rant…

It is once again that time of year when the majority—as we like to call them, though I think we all have some idea of what’s going on—gather around the tree and exchange mass-produced gifts while those of us who like to think we are more thoughtful, cynical, or broke (and some might assert Christian) gather into dark corners and complain about “Christmas commercialism” and further about how we will wait yet another year to change it. Nothing is ever new.
I’ve been brooding on it because I realize that more frustration and indifference is given for this tradition with each passing year. If I am going to rant, complain, and be cynical, I may as well do it in an organized manner and write it out so I have something more concrete to work with. Here are a few of my thoughts on our season, especially on the tradition of gift-giving:

Christmas is oftentimes a risk-free venture: We are emotionally detached from whatever we give to others because the gift-ness of it is mediated through cash instead of personal meaning. We put nothing of ourselves forward when we give gifts because for so many of our gifts we hold onto the receipts just in case. If it’s not what they want, no big deal, we can get something similar in its place. It seldom happens that we put forward something that is truly a valuable thought or part of ourselves that leaves us exposed so that the other person can see our care and accept that, or carelessly trample it.
One of the most thoughtful gifts I’ve seen given was (I’ll keep the names out) when one person secretly took his wife’s vinyl collection from her youth and converted them to CD’s so they could be listened to again more readily. He said he put at least twenty hours into this, I believe. When she received them she basically shrugged and said she only ever cared to listen to a couple of the CD’s he converted. He was crushed.
But do you see what was put forward? Instead of putting forward a few dollars that we’ll always have anyway, he put forward something that was invested in who she is, a thought about what matters to her that once put forward, could not be revoked. It was a permanent sacrifice that could not be replaced. He put forward time, which is invaluable beside any amount of money because it is permanent. Otherwise, after giving our gift, we can move on and have no true advances in our relationship with another. No trust is built or shaken. We often prefer to connect with our gifts than the people behind them.

What we put into Christmas has no inherent value to us: Again, because we always have money, and gifts are exchangeable, they have no value in-and-of themselves but only as they are useful to our entertainment until we find the need of something else. There is no personal value or meaning behind the gift beyond its mere use. More often than not, you could have received the Ocean’s 11 DVD this year, or last year, or five years ago. You can’t remember and you honestly don’t care because it’s just as entertaining each time you watch it no matter when you received it. It lacks what Walter Benjamin calls an aura, any value that attaches it to a particular moment in time and any value that is gained by its history over the years. Because we don’t put ourselves into it or any truly meaningful thought, when it is picked up again in another year, no memories are recalled of when it was received and how much it meant or why it was meaningful because it was just a part of a mass-produced train-of-thought that the giver happened to jump onto for a moment just to help them ride through another holiday season. It has no attachment to any point in time, any events, nor tells any story. It’s usually hard to look at a Starbucks gift certificate and to recall why you wanted it the particular year you got it, or what receiving it tells you about the person you got it from.
Maybe it will be said that I’m reading too much into this, but I believe this speaks volumes about our society. We seem to no longer value history or memory, only the pending moment. We care foremost about what keeps our attention for a moment, and if it is lost, it is no big matter because no huge part of ourselves is lost. When something of true value is gone, with it is lost is part of who you are, memories of who you were. Say someone wrote a poem for you as part of a gift, or made a craft of personal value. Reading the poem may tell you about certain goings-on at the time you first read it. It was a part of the giver, not another cookie from the cutter, at the time it was received. The craft takes on wear over time, and it actually matters if it breaks because it cannot be replaced. All of the memories of the times it has been used and dropped never leave the object, and it is silly to think to buy a look-alike to remind you of the memories of someone else’s craft you got rid of. We have an odd tendency to attribute meaning to ordinary objects: not “Aw, this was the watch you paid $105.99 for, plus shipping and handling” but “You gave this to me when we had that fight, and I threw this at you, and there’s the dent that looks just like that dent on your forehead.”

Hm… that was long-winded. And this is all to say nothing about the time when the ultimate meaning was attached to our world when God took on flesh. I don’t want to overuse the cliché of Jesus being the ultimate Christmas gift, but few of us end up crucified from our Holiday gift-giving, and though that may not be a necessary aspiration, it is worth our consideration. No other gift was so meaningfully or closely related to real people, and God did not attach a receipt to the baby and wait to apologize when the receiver was disappointed. “Hello there,” He might have said, “You are going to take this baby whether you like it or not. This is the Word, part of myself begotten to you. I am well pleased with Him. This is hope. You cannot return to sender, though you will probably thrash him around a bit.” And that we did…

I hope you enjoyed ranting with me for yet another holiday. I think we could stand to gather and do it again in another year when we reflect on how much hasn’t changed by next Christmas.